2014 National Erection

So, what’s all this I hear about a national erection?

 I hear that many of the male politicians are having one and probably some of the females. As with most erections, it’s all in their heads. They get themselves worked up into a frenzy for at least a few months preceding said erection until they can no longer hold back. They tell their lovers, the public (or is that pubic?) anything they want to hear so that they can get the most from their erection. Half-truths and outright lies are just about the only things that come out of their mouths until, at long last, the erection is over. Those who win their attempt bask in the afterglow and puff up like the cock of the walk and those who lose their erection usually walk away downtrodden and unsatisfied with their performance. Their public is usually left disappointed and wanting. Some may later come back and try again, but their public may have other ideas.

What?!? Election? I thought you said erection.

Oh.